Small Town Secrets

Everyone wants to know if I am visiting the star attraction when I get to my country home. The polar bears. Everyone has heard about the great polar bears and the exhibit in which you can swim with the polar bears!

I knew that I would have no problems adjusting my natural sense of humour for my roommate when we discussed this local attraction.

As she said: "If you want to go visit an old polar bear with no teeth its great. He's so old they have to prop his mouth open and use a pole to shove the watermelon in".

I have no idea if anyone else in town is selling out this secret. The town is filled with little polar bear souvenirs - statues, t-shirts erasers. She is also from away so perhaps that is why she feel free to share the secret of the money making decrepit polar bear.

I have also been warned that every town in the area claims Tim Horton as their son. Thankfully I was not too excited about the link so I'm not disappointed.

In 8 weeks time I expect I will know many secrets that can't be repeated here! I just hope that a few of them are as funny as the polar bear!

No! No! Not Magic!

You may know that I have a thing about clowns. Can't stand them and frankly I'm a little afraid of them. Mimes too. Add to the list magic. Can't stand magic shows. Mostly because I know its fake so what's the point? Not only is it fake it is something that is learned - the best magic is a new trick that no one has ever thought of and then once its been performed its old news. I also can't stand the gets up and the theatrics. Doug Henning - say no more.

So while perusing Ship of Fools website I was startled to see a "magic" bible that produces fire when you open it. I traced it to a magic site that has all kinds of Gospel magic for witnessing. Silk scarves, rope tricks - books on how to tell the Gospel with any items the audience has on hand. Yuck. My favourite - 3 card monte -with 2 cards with Christ's face and one of a 100 dollar bill - the trick is to choose money but of course the value is in choosing Christ. Yuck!

Whether it is my healthy secular glasses or my postmodern mind I can't help but think how very wrong it is to use tricks to sell Jesus. There is already a suspiscion that witnessing is a trick to take money or common sense away from non-Christians so why mix the two? I feel a rant coming on...sort of like my feeling about fake greenery and flowers near the pulpit....