Help - The Children's Message

While the pastor is away for 4 Sundays I may be called upon to do the Children's Message. For the uninitiated this is when the children of the congregation are called up and the pastor gives them something to think about - it should be interesting, something that all ages can relate to, memorable and connected with the theme and message of the service.

I can preach a 20 minute sermon but the 5 minute time with the children kills me. It takes me a week to come up with the idea and prop. Some of the children require guidance in listening. Some continually point their bum up in the air towards the congregation during the message. Some interupt continually with non related info mumbled so that I can't tell if the child is communicating their love of video games, that they are hungry or that the balcony is on fire. And until I can convince the Pastor that I now have this down and am comfortable with it he is going to give me lots of opportunities to do it. Its going to be a long month!

Oh No, I've Discovered youtube

Our PC sound wasn't working for the longest time and now that it is I have access to youtube. I came across this link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1u93VduIUI

Its about clown training as a form of ministry and at first I was convinced they were kidding but by the end I'm not too sure. It was funny but not enough to be a satire. Anyone who knows my fear of clowns will understand that clown ministry is in my books one of the Dark Arts.

The MultiMedia Generation

I was playing a board game with the kids that their father used to play. Its actually quite fun because it relies on lots of spaces that say take another turn and move ahead and draw cards and stuff so they don't get too bored with it. During the game one of them realised it was time for a cartoon he likes. He asked me to "pause the game while we watch this". I explained that boards games are not like X Box where we pause the game - Aunt Vicki is not going to sit in suspended animation for half an hour. I lost out to a cheesy cartoon! Some of the cartoons - particularly the anime ones totally lose me. There is one where its a guy but as a superhero he turns into an adult androgenous woman - as near as I can tell.

I'm old.

When I Grow Up.

Apparently my four year old niece (well not biologically) sees some mothering instincts in me. She told me yesteray that "You will make a good mommy when you grow up". I'm not sure if this is a statement on my adultness or just that she figures if you don't have children you haven't grown up yet. She asked her brother for confirmation (he's 5) and he gave a rather unenthusiastic sound. I don't let them get away with much so maybe he's figuring that he could find better!

He later told me that when I get old I am going to yell at people and he killed himself laughing. Now this is in fact quite true - I just couldn't figure out how he knew that. He remembered a card my brother got me in June with an old lady on the front who is a crank and how as I reach old age that's where I'm going. I was quite surprised that he could remember this card but apparently it has struck a chord with him.

Weddings in Edwards Gardens

SO On 07/07/07 Lesley and I went to see the brides at Edwards Gardens. In the parking lot we came across a few cars "decorated" with white fabric and gold tinsel - it looked like a Christmas angel was taken out on a hit and run. Well, we found the wedding party that these cars belonged to - you may have seen them on the news. We took a picture because I just don't have the full vocabularly to really paint the picture.

An older lady came over and was not very approving - she told us the world is changing and she can't keep up.

We later saw a beautiful wedding which took place after the Egyptian/Roman theme. Unfortunately as the bride and groom were saying there vows a man decided that that was a good time to get right in there and take some pictures of the fountain - then his family joined him. I wanted to go down and quietly lead them away - the people around us were muttering and murmuring about how outrageous it was and can't they see there is a wedding go on and so forth. Anyhow, Lesley didn't want me to get involved - but my feet were itching to go and fix it!

Weddings at the gardens are a riot. You are guaranteed to see a wide range of fashions - particularly the bridesmaids, some really cheesy photo shoots and the occasional ceremony. I doubt I will see one quite like this one again though!

Burial Shoes

Apparently, I'm just a babe in the woods (see my entry below). I found this website that talks about the absurdity of the funeral industry and another business opportunity I was unaware of: burial shoes

http://www.funerals.org/decca.htm

I design clothes for the dead.

While lurking around the Internet looking for funeral related t-shirts and stuff for a relative in Holland, I came across a whole industry I was unaware of. Burial clothes. Most of the providers of this are offering shrouds and such, some are offering clothing for funeral directors (I always thought they just got that stuff at Sears) but Sindy's Designs offers a whole new perspective. They create clothing that funeral homes can have on hand so the bereaved don't need to go out and buy something if they don't have anything suitable at home.

The bizarre fascination with looking our best for our funeral is a North American thing (with an exception here and there). Its contrived, costly and fools no one though we like to stand around and pretend that Aunt Enid really looks good. I used to have romantic notions of death -Snow White's glass coffin with her perpetual youth encased in it seemed ideal. Looking good requires a bit of manipulation and approaches taxidermy a bit too much for my liking. But if you are worried about having "nothing to wear" check out this site: http://www.sindysdesigns.com/ You can't see the pictures of the merchandise unless you are brave enough to fill in a fabricated identity. But here is a quote:

"I appreciate the quality of the dresses I buy from Sindy's. The colors are so complementary of the colors in the caskets. And the men's suits are complete with tie, etc." Gail Krien, Krien Funeral Home, Davis, Oklahoma

'nough said.