I'm so tired! It was another good day at the summit. There were some very good guests who have such an incredible drive. One that I really liked is the CEO of Best Buy who just seems like such a nice guy - he really believes in his employees!
I realised watching these different leaders that it is the ones who are focused on the process rather than only the end result that I really relate to. Hybels I think is a very end result person, and I have worked for these kind of people and I find them insensitive to the needs of the employees. That's not to say that I think the process is the most import thing - but I think that it is really important and a good result with a lousy process for the staff doesn't make me happy. The bottom line is often all that some of these leaders gets excited about - I get excited about the journey getting to the bottom line. I noticed the leaders that I really admired the most were the ones who loved the people they were serving - they believed in the people that they led. I don't know how we do church without that.
The CEO of Best Buy said he spends the majority of his time dealing with the complexities of people - that sounds very familiar. I had a boss that tried to outrun the staff. She basically told me that she would rush past the doorway to the Department so they wouldn't see her. She couldn't take the whining and complaining. I also noticed that she tended to promise things to staff that were impossible to deliver. So I ran the people - she gave me the target to meet. How I met it she didn't care - and she thought that I spent too much time being fair. She once told me - I don't want to know anything about the people and their private lives. I was supposed to be a Supervisor but in reality I was a manager. In some ways I hated that job - it was tough on my ego, people aren't very appreciative no matter how much you do for them. It was also a 24 hour a day job - there was no backup, I was always on call. It didn't matter that people didn't call often - it was knowing that I was always "on". I was having dinner with a friend and a staff member managed to have me tracked down to the restaurant.
I was a young supervisor who had a real hellion of a boss as a mentor. I did well but I now know how much better I would be at that role today with my Christian walk, the Holy Spirit and maturity to guide me. Pastoring is very close to supervising in skill breadth, frustration levels (you deal with complicated people all day) and multiple bosses with shifting focus. But the pressure is higher. But then again the top boss is very supportive!
Friday, August 08, 2008
Thursday, August 07, 2008
The Better Way
I took the Richmond Hill bus today and was it ever nice. The website asked me where I was and directed me to the nearest stop. It told me the different ways I could get to my destination based on walking time and transfers. Very efficient.
Meanwhile, the TTC is a whole other story....I went the other day with a ten dollar bill - if you put a ten into the machine it will dispense four tokens plus your change. It didn't like my two fives - I was later told you need to use a ten. Why? Anyhow, I take my two fives to the booth to buy four tokens. I'm told he can't sell me four - he can only sell me five - but then its 11.25. Huh? Why can't he sell me four? Ian tried to explain this to me but honestly I'm still not getting it - something about it being a deal if I buy 5. But I only want four and I only had a ten in my hand. Why on earth would someone buy in multiples of 5? Ten will last you a week. Four will last you two trips there and back but five? Since they no longer sell tickets all that has to happen is he little tokens come whizzing out the machine - its not difficult. I guess just I am.
Which was the best part of my day buying my 100 dollar bra last week.
Meanwhile, the TTC is a whole other story....I went the other day with a ten dollar bill - if you put a ten into the machine it will dispense four tokens plus your change. It didn't like my two fives - I was later told you need to use a ten. Why? Anyhow, I take my two fives to the booth to buy four tokens. I'm told he can't sell me four - he can only sell me five - but then its 11.25. Huh? Why can't he sell me four? Ian tried to explain this to me but honestly I'm still not getting it - something about it being a deal if I buy 5. But I only want four and I only had a ten in my hand. Why on earth would someone buy in multiples of 5? Ten will last you a week. Four will last you two trips there and back but five? Since they no longer sell tickets all that has to happen is he little tokens come whizzing out the machine - its not difficult. I guess just I am.
Which was the best part of my day buying my 100 dollar bra last week.
I WANT CHICKEN BALLS!!
Yum - check out that chemically sauce!
Okay, I get to eat lunch out tomorrow - really there is no where to store a sack lunch and I don't have the car to put one in. So there is a couple of Chinese restaurants across the street that look good. But honestly, I'm in the mood for chicken balls. I promised myself that I would never order chicken balls in an authentic style restaurant. Why such pride? Why do I care what they think - if they all say in Chinese - touristy white girl in booth two wants chicken balls?
And that is the theme of my life right now. I don't have to prove to them that I can eat somewhat authentic (I still don't eat feet or tripe or anything) Chinese food - I know I can. Like the newfound state of freedom - I can preach - yeah sure, I need practice but I don't need to prove it to anyone. Take it or leave it. Or like going to Calvin - if I don't like their demands, well heck, I'll go somewhere else - I don't need to prove anything. Today chicken balls, tomorrow the world!
So maybe tomorrow I will get chicken balls...with steamed rice - that way they know I have a little class.
Dutch People Don't Like to Touch
At the conference today Bill who is Dutch was responding to a presenter and touched him on the arm. During the conversation the other gentlemen noted that he too was Dutch. Bill said "I'm surprised you let me touch you then!". Everyone laughed as though this is a known fact. It wasn't until I went to a Willow Creek conference that I learned that the Dutch have a stereotype of being cheap.
I think this might be an Dutch-American thing. In Holland there was way too much kissing going on for my liking - both cheeks - please - watch my boundaries. But expression of heartfelt emotion does seem to be limited. People talk a lot about what they think - but not much about how they feel. Instead of people criticizing I wonder how it would sound if they talked about their feelings? I bet stuff would create more sympathy then hostility.
Leadership Summit - Day One (2)
I totally forgot another thing I saw today! The second presenter had a teaching style very close to mine. He has passion but it is subdued - he doesn't talk loudly - more on the softer side. When he tells a story his pace picks up - he tends to hold the lecturn like he is trying to drive it somewhere. He has the same type of humour and mixes questions with statements. It was really odd - I have not been happy with my style because it is not as bold as I would like it to be. I hope that when I get more experience there will be more oomph to my style. But it was very affirming to see a guy with my style - I looked around the crowd and I could see that people were listening and interested. Even the way he tells stories had a really similar feel - I've never had that happen before.
I might see if I can buy his session to compare - maybe I can learn something watching him on ways that I can improve. I want my classmates to watch a piece of this and see if they see the resemblance and how they feel watching him. I wonder if guys think his style is wussy.
Watching others not like me is helpful to pick up tips but doesn't help as much because they are so different. I also unconsciously "ape" people at times where I pick up their style of inflection and stuff which is weird and not something I like doing - I hate to pick up someone else's voice rather than be authentic to my own way.
I might see if I can buy his session to compare - maybe I can learn something watching him on ways that I can improve. I want my classmates to watch a piece of this and see if they see the resemblance and how they feel watching him. I wonder if guys think his style is wussy.
Watching others not like me is helpful to pick up tips but doesn't help as much because they are so different. I also unconsciously "ape" people at times where I pick up their style of inflection and stuff which is weird and not something I like doing - I hate to pick up someone else's voice rather than be authentic to my own way.
Leadership Summit - Day One
Every year I go to the Leadership Summit put on by Willow Creek. Every year I have some kind of epiphany. I don't know if I remember all of the years:
the first - just the sheer excitement of being at a conference that was so well done that mixed leadership with being Christian.
the second - this was the year that I was going to take the pastor aside and tell him I was moving on from the church to somewhere else. But in the first session it was as if Bill was speaking directly to my unhappiness and I had - Bill said that you need to align your self with God's heart - that what wrecks your heart, your passion might just be what wrecks God's heart too. This was a huge revelation for me - the state of the church wrecked my heart - maybe I shouldn't be leaving because the church was making me unhappy - maybe that was why I should stay. By the end of the morning session I knew I was meant to stay. It was beginning of the year where I didn't have a role in the church anymore and I had "burned bridges" - I can say that it was the hardest year of all.
the third year - I sensed that this was the time to go. I went to Willow waiting for the magic where all my doubts would be cast aside - this time Bill talked about leadership paradigms where leaders reach a place where they can no longer be challenged - not because they were at their capacity but because no one would allow it. The pastor hadn't come this year so I couldn't really process it with anyone. By the end of the first session, I knew that staying at the church was really a big question mark - I was no longer challenged - I had made my peace with parishioners and sat on the sidelines for a year with no opportunity to volunteer in ministry. And I was going into my third and final year of schooling. I made once last ditch effort to stay by coming up with a ministry plan for the coming year in preparation for seminary. But that fell through so I moved on to become a member at the church that I was working in.
the fourth year - this was a weird year. I went with a team from my former church and noted how negatively the leaders talked about the congregation. Even in front of a couple that were new to the church. I prayed about it - wanting to take the team aside and tell them that there perspective was really self-serving - but decided against it. This was the year that I wondered when Bill would talk about loving one another. He always has great insight - he loves the church, he loves Christ, he loves leading, he loves the lost - but you know, I have never heard him say anything that talks about his love for his fellow parishioners. I wondered if this was a blind spot or if he had talked about it so much in other years.
Today. I listened to Bill. I have recently reread his book Courageous Leadership. I know he picks leaders based on the three C's - character, competency and chemistry. If he doesn't think he will want to work long hours with you he doesn't put you on the team. I have been in the position where I was told I was picked for a team on the three C's - which means when you are rejected from a team you wonder which of the C's you screwed up on. I have thought about this alot and other of Bill's unapologetic approaches to leaders. He tends to classify and slot people - he has various types of leaders that he looks for. He insists on only taking a 10/10 person on a team. He will go to other churches looking for a 10 rather than settling for a 9. Having been on the other side of ministry - where you want to serve but don't measure up, I have been thinking about this a lot more. I respect Bill and agree with him on some things. But this is the year that I suddenly realized that what Bill and pastors who follow Bill's leadership style are missing is something that I can do. I can take a group of people and work with them. I did it in the workplace where I inherited unionized staff with longevity. I was happy to lose a few through natural attrition, laid one off and the rest shone in their jobs. They became empowered, responsible and in five years no longer required a supervisor. I don't need 10's - and I don't need perfect chemistry to create a team. Bill works with a staff of over 40 people - he can afford to be choosy - I don't have that privilege.
I also wonder what this means about learning to love people and empower them as they are gifted. Does Bill really love the people he serves? I never hear him talk about love - I hear hard words - that good teams mean hard decisions. I think some good teams come from being spiritually mature enough to help people become who God created them to be. That's not to say I wouldn't let someone go off of a team if they couldn't play nicely - but it does mean that I would never wait until the person meets my standards before putting them on a team. Why would I want a team of like minded people in charge of a diverse group of people?
So, I'm bidding farewell to worrying about why I don't agree with Bill and his followers on some pretty big things. Bill works wonders with his leadership style - but God can work through me using mine too. My preChristian personality fit well with Bill's style - measure people up, reject the ones you don't want and move on. I'm trying a different route now - it might take longer and I may never be considered a "great leader" but at least I may unearth some great leaders that just needed a bit of time and exposure to be unearthed.
the first - just the sheer excitement of being at a conference that was so well done that mixed leadership with being Christian.
the second - this was the year that I was going to take the pastor aside and tell him I was moving on from the church to somewhere else. But in the first session it was as if Bill was speaking directly to my unhappiness and I had - Bill said that you need to align your self with God's heart - that what wrecks your heart, your passion might just be what wrecks God's heart too. This was a huge revelation for me - the state of the church wrecked my heart - maybe I shouldn't be leaving because the church was making me unhappy - maybe that was why I should stay. By the end of the morning session I knew I was meant to stay. It was beginning of the year where I didn't have a role in the church anymore and I had "burned bridges" - I can say that it was the hardest year of all.
the third year - I sensed that this was the time to go. I went to Willow waiting for the magic where all my doubts would be cast aside - this time Bill talked about leadership paradigms where leaders reach a place where they can no longer be challenged - not because they were at their capacity but because no one would allow it. The pastor hadn't come this year so I couldn't really process it with anyone. By the end of the first session, I knew that staying at the church was really a big question mark - I was no longer challenged - I had made my peace with parishioners and sat on the sidelines for a year with no opportunity to volunteer in ministry. And I was going into my third and final year of schooling. I made once last ditch effort to stay by coming up with a ministry plan for the coming year in preparation for seminary. But that fell through so I moved on to become a member at the church that I was working in.
the fourth year - this was a weird year. I went with a team from my former church and noted how negatively the leaders talked about the congregation. Even in front of a couple that were new to the church. I prayed about it - wanting to take the team aside and tell them that there perspective was really self-serving - but decided against it. This was the year that I wondered when Bill would talk about loving one another. He always has great insight - he loves the church, he loves Christ, he loves leading, he loves the lost - but you know, I have never heard him say anything that talks about his love for his fellow parishioners. I wondered if this was a blind spot or if he had talked about it so much in other years.
Today. I listened to Bill. I have recently reread his book Courageous Leadership. I know he picks leaders based on the three C's - character, competency and chemistry. If he doesn't think he will want to work long hours with you he doesn't put you on the team. I have been in the position where I was told I was picked for a team on the three C's - which means when you are rejected from a team you wonder which of the C's you screwed up on. I have thought about this alot and other of Bill's unapologetic approaches to leaders. He tends to classify and slot people - he has various types of leaders that he looks for. He insists on only taking a 10/10 person on a team. He will go to other churches looking for a 10 rather than settling for a 9. Having been on the other side of ministry - where you want to serve but don't measure up, I have been thinking about this a lot more. I respect Bill and agree with him on some things. But this is the year that I suddenly realized that what Bill and pastors who follow Bill's leadership style are missing is something that I can do. I can take a group of people and work with them. I did it in the workplace where I inherited unionized staff with longevity. I was happy to lose a few through natural attrition, laid one off and the rest shone in their jobs. They became empowered, responsible and in five years no longer required a supervisor. I don't need 10's - and I don't need perfect chemistry to create a team. Bill works with a staff of over 40 people - he can afford to be choosy - I don't have that privilege.
I also wonder what this means about learning to love people and empower them as they are gifted. Does Bill really love the people he serves? I never hear him talk about love - I hear hard words - that good teams mean hard decisions. I think some good teams come from being spiritually mature enough to help people become who God created them to be. That's not to say I wouldn't let someone go off of a team if they couldn't play nicely - but it does mean that I would never wait until the person meets my standards before putting them on a team. Why would I want a team of like minded people in charge of a diverse group of people?
So, I'm bidding farewell to worrying about why I don't agree with Bill and his followers on some pretty big things. Bill works wonders with his leadership style - but God can work through me using mine too. My preChristian personality fit well with Bill's style - measure people up, reject the ones you don't want and move on. I'm trying a different route now - it might take longer and I may never be considered a "great leader" but at least I may unearth some great leaders that just needed a bit of time and exposure to be unearthed.
Tuesday, August 05, 2008
Gun Pulled on Parking Officer
A local parking enforcement officer had a gun pulled on him as he waited for police to come grab a stolen car he was sitting on.
This is a common occurence, finding a stolen car I mean, not getting a gun pulled on you. A parking guy gets ready to ticket a car and it turns out its stolen. If the police want to do fingerprinting and stuff then they have to come to the location and take possession of the car, seal it and send it to a police pound. If they are too busy, you may wait a while - you can't leave the car because you need to show some continuity of evidence and besides the theif may come back for it. Sometimes you can wait a few hours..
We know the person involved, luckily he was able to defend himself by punching the guy and managed to grab the gun.
There will now be a renewed call for officers to be armed - either with guns or a nightstick. Nightsticks require ongoing training and personally I wouldn't bring a night stick to a gun fight.
This ought to be quite the discussion around the stations and hopefully calmer heads will prevail.
This is a common occurence, finding a stolen car I mean, not getting a gun pulled on you. A parking guy gets ready to ticket a car and it turns out its stolen. If the police want to do fingerprinting and stuff then they have to come to the location and take possession of the car, seal it and send it to a police pound. If they are too busy, you may wait a while - you can't leave the car because you need to show some continuity of evidence and besides the theif may come back for it. Sometimes you can wait a few hours..
We know the person involved, luckily he was able to defend himself by punching the guy and managed to grab the gun.
There will now be a renewed call for officers to be armed - either with guns or a nightstick. Nightsticks require ongoing training and personally I wouldn't bring a night stick to a gun fight.
This ought to be quite the discussion around the stations and hopefully calmer heads will prevail.
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