Low Carb Induced Irritability

I'm on day 10 of my low carb diet. I'm itchy and twitchy and I can't stop thinking about a warm dinner roll with butter. Or a plain piece of bread. I'm actually enjoying the bran crisps that I thought everyone was crazy for liking.

The loss of sugar is no biggie. Though I am eating these wonderful sugar free fudgie candies. But one does it. Its the bread. And potato chips. And even those crappy frozen McCain fries that suddenly are very appealing.

The plan has me on about 20 carbs a day. Everything that is not a fat or protein is a carb. Fiber is a carb but since you don't digest it, it doesn't count. How low is 20 carbs:

hamburger roll - 20

white bread - 10

pita - 30

cup of white rice - 40+

raw carrot - 5

1/2 cup broccoli - 2

So even if I were to sneak in the bread at 10 it would be hard not to go over once I try to eat some veggies. Carrots aren't allowed because of the sugar. I've only lost 4 pounds so far and if I don't lose more I have to stay on in for another week before they up everything. My metabolism sucks! I've started walking but its not like your metabolism is suddenly going to kick into high gear right away. I'm hoping that tomorrow I will be back to being content - I felt fine yesterday!

Just for KS - my neighbour!

This is especially for KS who is a blog virgin. She doesn't read them and doesn't write them.

So, K, do you remember the story from years ago about the volunteer job that I quit that I don't tell anymore because now I'm a Christian and that kind of stuff is not gracious? I posted it for LK to read because he is a post-Christian friend who has not heard the story. Your goal is to try to find it.

Look in the listings on the right hand side for the week that contains June 4th. Click on that and it will open the blogs for that week. It should say something like "For LK" or something like that. Then click on it to read it.

The reason you see initials instead of full names is to keep our identities secret in case someone I would prefer not read it is reading it. Like the Bully ;)

I think I'm screwed...

So many things converged to one incident that I have to take responsibility for:

1) My cat loves to drink my pop. I do not like her drinking my pop, especially if she chooses to stick her foot in it. I know where that foot has been! So isn't it cute to give her a little bowl of water to drink while I drink my pop?

2) So help me if that phone is ringing because D has another question about this vacuum I'll scream - as I lunge to get to the phone because C is sleeping - the water sloshes over the side of the bowl

3) Which I don't notice until I come back to the laptop and notice water dripping out of one of the ports.

It has totally died. With the beginnings of my paper on Cyprian in there. I feel incredibly guilty because we bought it second hand for my course. I don't use it much for that but it is an incredible stupid move on my part.

Many times I have thought, "should I move that water?". Thinking without action is of much use!

More on Father Ted

As usual, you have to read the previous post for any of this to make sense.

More on Father Ted:

My favourite character is Father Dougal who is the younger curate to Father Ted who is experienced. Father Dougal is the child like Christian who speaks truth at all times and is usually quite confused by the world around him:

.
Bishop Facks: So, Father. Do you ever have any doubts about the religious life? Is your faith ever tested? Anything you would be worried about? Any doubts you've been having about any aspects of belief? Anything like that?
Father Dougal: Well, you know the way God made us all, right? And he's looking down at us from heaven and everything?
Bishop Facks: Uh-huh. [nods]
Father Dougal: And then his son came down and saved everyone and all that?
Bishop Facks: Yes.
Father Dougal: And when we die we're all going to go to heaven?
Bishop Facks: Yes. What about it?
Father Dougal: Well, that's the bit I have trouble with.

Father Ted on the other hand is wiser but also more skeptical and less Christ like then Dougal given his cynicism as opposed to confused belief.

POLICEMAN- It's a straight choice father. Either they pay the 200 pound fine, or it's a night in the cells
TED- Well, priests don't usually carry that sort of money on them, and under the circumstances, I think a night cells might be a better option
POLICEMAN- (Nods his head)
DOUGAL- Ted....
TED- Shutup Dougal
DOUGAL- No Ted....
TED- I told you to shutup Dougal
DOUGAL- I was just going to say that....
TED- Alright! Alright! Here! (pulls out the money) Here's your blood money.But let me tell you this! There used to be a time when the police of thiscountry were friends of the church! Drink driving charges quashed, parkingtickets ripped up, even the blind eye turned to the odd murder! But now!(Turns to Dougal) And you! (Mocking Dougal) "Ted Ted why don't you give him the 200 pounds you won on the bet!" Well i did! Are you happy? Once again,you've made me look like a complete idiot in front of many people. Thank youso much.
DOUGAL- Ehh, Right. To be honest Ted, i forgot you had the money. I wasjust going to say that your that your fly is open.


Father Ted: It's not as if everyone's going to go off and join some mad religious cult just because we go off for a picnic for a couple of hours.
Father Dougal: God, Ted, I heard about those cults. Everyone dressing in black and saying our Lord's gonna come back and judge us all!
Father Ted: No... No, Dougal, that's us. That's Catholicism.

What to do, what to do?

I have got the letter written for Council. It is much gentler than I would describe things to others. But it may still not be received well.

This is the problem. Do I just give a terse, "see ya' around" or what I have written which spotlights my version of truth with a hint to what happened? Council has handled my time at the church badly. They won't give a reference for another church. They had nothing nice to say about my application for ministry - only negative. They did not meet with me to ask questions before they made their decision. And worse of all they have never met with me to discuss my call.

How can you make a major life altering decision for someone without at least talking to them?

And here is the problem. This is a result of group think. There are council members who would ask these questions and have met with me and have been supportive. The problem is that the end result forwarded by two representatives does not provide those nuances. And for those who tend to remain quiet and resigned to the way things unfold they do not voice their opinion as loudly as others. The fact that Council did not reach concensus yet rendered a decision is disturbing. IMHO -those that allow others to speak on their behalf should be aware of the costs of doing this.

This isn't a conversation about the colour of the carpets (for once!) but my calling, my career and my character. To label me as having un Christ-like behaviour is not very helpful. First of all, I admit that I exhibit un Christ like behaviour every day. Its funny how my normal (that is non-Christian friends) automatically exclaim - "but I thought that was the point - no one's perfect"

No, more concerning is how this sounds to others. What exactly is the nature of the behaviour - do I slam doors in people's faces either figuratively or literally? or perhaps I have a knack for finding missing money! There is a great show Father Ted - loved that show even before I became Christian. Father Ted is always alluding to some scandal by exclaiming "The money was only resting in my account!".

Another running gag is that he is always calling other Fathers on their cell phones at the most inopportune times. You'll see a phone ringing while one is skiing, or driving on a particularly dangerous road as Ted calls. Ted is always blissfully unaware that in attempting to answer his call he has killed off or injured another Father. I have a friend who has reverted to a cell phone in lieu of a home phone. I hate calling because I always imagine some tricky situation where a phone call is just too distracting!

I digress......

Rye! This isn't toast!

Having ordered by breakfast toast and being delivered rye I was very quick to politely ask for white! I am not wasting my birthday carbs on rye toast - normally I would just eat it rather than return it.

I have already discovered that I have been accidentallly cheating - I found these really great (its all relative) wafer cookies with some kind of odd "icing" in the middle that looked okay on the diet. It now turns out that I am only allowed two during the day. I'm saving them for when I crave a doughnut. I got into the habit of coffee and doughnuts and not having that doughnut is tough.

I went to a health food store and thought about how I was thrown together with others who form distinct groups that don't necessarily approve of each other:

the organic nuts
the diabetic/low carb nuts
the "I won't eat anything with a face" nuts
the severe allery sufferers (truly there as a last resort)

Its harder to pick out the allergy sufferers - unless they are poring over the gluten free stuff. In the cosmetics section they could be the vegans.

The diabetic/low carbs is pretty easy to pick out. Like picking out the whore at the cottillion. Fat, middle aged with a slightly resigned look on their face. We know we are not part of this world - we are simply grabbing from it what we can.

The organic/vegans are hard to identify. There are probably vegans which are both. There are likely organic people that lean towards vegetarianism if only because it is hard to get truly free range animal parts!

So we are all in the store wandering around, some perhaps blissfully unaware that we have been grouped together not because we support one another's version of healthy eating but because we are in it for ourselves. The fact that I notice the other nuts there makes is obvious that I am the worst offender. I just suspect the vegan would not be pleased to know all of the delicious animal toppings I am going to try on my bran crispbread!! A very nebulous "unity in diversity".