One of my passions.

This is a sample of this amazing photographer's work that I came across on the Internet (http://www.pbase.com/rcalmes/profile). Ballet is one of my things - I never wanted to perform on stage but the precision of the dance is fascinating to me. I'm not artistic enough to appreciate the art side of it - the music and such, but the nuance of each move, even how you hold your fingertips in position has always made me want to dance. I loved classes but its not the kind of thing you can do as a hobby - to get to point work requires a lot of class time which we just couldn't afford and I couldn't obtain because we moved around so much. Watching performances used to enthrall me but now it is reminds me more of how much I would rather do it then watch it!

I'm a Military Brat

I am a Military Brat

My hometown is nowhere, my friends are everywhere.
I grew up with the knowledge that home is where the heart is
and the family....

Mobility is my way of life.
Some would wonder about roots, yet they are as deep and strong
as the mighty oak. I sink them quickly, absorbing all an area offers
and hopefully, giving enrichment in return.

Travel has taught me to be open.
Shaking hands with the universe, I find brotherhood in all men.
Farewells are never easy.
Yet, even in sorrow comes strength and ability to face tomorrow
with anticipation....if when we leave one place,
I feel that half my world is left behind. I also know that
the other half is waiting to be met.

Friendships are formed in hours and kept for decades.
I will never grow up with someone, but I will mature with many.
Be it inevitable that paths part, there is constant hope
that they will meet again.

Love of country, respect and pride
fill my being when our flag passes in review.
When I stand to honor that flag, so also do I stand in honor of all
soldiers, and most especially, to the parents whose life created mine
Because of this, I have shared in the rich heritage of Military life.
Anonymous

When To Speak Up

I went to this thing tonight at the church - it was supposed to be a place to learn about Judaism in light of the fact that we have many Jews living in our neighbourhood.

It was presented by someone who did not have first hand knowledge about Judaism but had been selected because of his role in the denomination to be a presenter.

The teaching process was that rather than tell us about Judaism we were to reflect in groups what we already knew about Judaism. The questions were:

practices and observations
similarities and differences between Judaism and Christianity
what is important to Jewish people

Rather then be taught these things we reflected on them in a group setting. I thought I knew very little about Judaism so was interested in learning - instead I received a hodge podge of individual thoughts - some of them very negative and many of them totally out of context.

I heard so many disrespectful things at my table that I could not remain silent - yet that seems to be the preferred response. Stay silent, be gracious. This frustrates me I have been criticized before for being too vocal so I'm trying to be quiet.

I wasn't raised this way - I was raised to challenge ignorance, not to condemn the speaker but to challenge the thinking. I was raised that to let people speak poorly of another group without facts or in context is racism and that it can not go unchallenged.

That the church would choose to let people say whatever they think about Judaism rather than teach us about Judaism is a strange choice. Can there be anything less useful then a bunch of Christians sitting around talking about something we know nothing about? And this isn't the first time - I sat through a session where the parishioner chosen to speak on an issue told us we needed to be very cautious because the Muslims are "infiltrating" Canada - that they are coming here to take over our beliefs (Christian) and to make Canada Muslim. I was angry at this - I have worked with Muslims who have been so grateful to come to Canada and they never pushed their beliefs on me but always took the time to explain their practices if asked.

So now I am torn, I really think that the discussion was unfit for outsiders to hear - I would have been very embarassed if a non-Christian or Jew was sitting in our discussion because we really came off showing our ignorance without learning from it. But when I say things I get the "look". We are taking another stab at Islam next week - I don't know whether to avoid it or go.

Friday's Feast -

Appetizer

Who was the last person you hugged?

My last intentional hug - that is go and do it was for a fellow classmate who preached for the first time to the class. She was really nervous and did very well - you couldn't even tell she was nervous - she seemed very much in control. I'm not a hugger normally but this seemed appropriate - that's a very "Vicki" comment isn't it? Analysing when a hug is appropriate!

Soup

Share a beauty or grooming trick or tip with us.

If you put lip gloss over your lipstick apply it only in the "pouty" section of your lips - it makes them fuller.

Salad

What does the color yellow make you think of?

Sunshine and pee. I don't know why. Daffodils too I suppose but that makes me think of cancer. I guess yellow just isn't my thing.

Main Course

If you were to make your living as a photographer, what subject would your pictures revolve around?

Now this is interesting because I was just talking about this tonight with someone. I don't like posed photos but I do like ones that catch people in their natural environment. I love ballet - a very girly thing I know but I love black and white photos of dancers en pointe. I also have always loved country churches - there are lots of them in Nova Scotia and I always wanted to learn how to paint them.

Dessert

What was the longest book you ever read?

I think Vanity Fair is pretty long. A lot of Dickens is long too. Some books have sadly been short but just seemed to take forever!

Its ALL About Prayer

Like thousands of people before me I have determined that life is all about prayer. Not a great revelation I suppose - its pretty evident from all of the prophets and Christ himself that prayer is ministry. We had a sermon today that I really appreciated because it talked a bit about obedience which has been my "goal" for some time. I am trying to learn to be satisfied with trying to be obedient to God. This has taken so much pressure off of me. I figured once I knew whether I had the ability to preach that I could then figure out my next steps. But its not that easy and now I am content just figuring out what God wants of me next. Its very exciting because I get glimpses of very exciting possibilities but then they disappear. I think this is done on purpose - God always gives me just enough to push me further - making it look easy and then once I'm committed he changes what seemed to be so clear to another unknown.

If I had not been at Calvary and given so much support I never would have gone into the InMinistry Program. I had already left one church in order to attend a traditional program. But once everything at Calvary seemed set in stone I knew it wasn't the right time and I had to move on. Its exciting in a way but requires a lot of prayer to keep from getting ahead of God's prompting.

But disappointingly I have come to the realisation that prayer is missing in some churches. It is an added thing, not an essential thing. I admit that I can't say I put a lot of time into prayer these past years - I have been learning through Seminary that it is the only thing I can rely on. I becoming much more serious about it. And my church has been promoting it for a few years now - that's funny isn't it - I mean that we have to make it a priority instead of just assuming that we are all doing it.

From my limited experience I have to say this is common. I say this because I was invited to sit on the World Day of Prayer planning group and with the very limited dealings I have had, prayer does not seem to be part of the planning. We had a meeting to plan the event and we will have a dry run through of the service and that's all. I thought we would meet as a group and pray and be given some "homework" to pray about as well.

I have to think about why this is. Why as Christians are some of us so removed from this means of communicating with God? I know that I had thought of it as an added feature instead of a fundamental - maybe everyone goes through that - maybe we need proof that it works before we become dedicated to it. I'm not sure. And I'm not sure how to find out - asking people about prayer is awkward - who is going to admit they don't pray enough?

I'm becoming interested in this area of ministry but unsure of where to go with it. I have a feeling that this may become a focus over the next year!

My Ministry is Like Solitaire

I have been playing a lot of Spider solitaire lately. Its much like regular solitaire but more fun. As I move the piles of cards around I get a rush - and when it looks like I've lost the game and see a move I can make I get another rush. As distracted as I am this is something that can keep me busy and is very satisifying - if I lose I simply replay the same game to see if I can win it doing something slightly different or play a whole new game.

I've noticed the same feeling about my ministry. While I wait for my church to determine if I can do some work with them as my sponsor I have all of these possibilities. There is the church itself, some contact names I have in the community and another church nearby that if mine falls through might hold a possibility. Meanwhile I am working with the CRC with Race Relations - maybe something will come of that. Finally, there is a person I can contact if I am interested in talking with Classis about going into ministry. So there are options, but like Spider the shifting from possibility to possibility begins a whole new challenge. I hate not knowing! I hope to remain in the Reformed tradition but at this rate who knows? Its frustrating not getting much feedback from my proposal - well no feedback so far - I'm not even sure if it got onto the Council's agenda at this point. So patience is required.

In the meantime I have paper to finish tomorrow. And the first two weeks of March I'm off - but I have a sermon to prepare and a paper to do on a passage in Ephesians that will require a lot of work. Sadly, the work for the paper is the same work I have to do for the sermon - but a different topic.

So I have a lot of stuff I'm doing but no real direction for the summer ahead. I hate investing time in my church if I am going to have to move on.

Ultimately it is all in God's hands and he will use me somewhere!

Hospital Signs

There was a sign that my friend saw in a hospital that she thought was really funny.

Communications Department
Quiet!

As ironic as it was it did make sense - when you open up the door to go into Communications there was no lobby - it opened up right behind the switchboard operators - so if you went in laughing at a joke and they were in the process of calling a Code Blue (patient not breathing) your laughter would get picked up over the mike. Not very professional.

But Ian saw a sign a few weeks ago that really has me puzzled. Upon registering at the CT Department, he was told to go down the hall and take a seat on the blue chairs. He went down the hall saw some chairs but none of them were blue - then he noticed the sign "These are the blue chairs". This seems incredibly stupid. I can only assume the blue chairs were out being cleaned. But why not just change the instructions? I pity the poor psych patients - they already have enough problems without looking for the elusive blue chairs. Not to mention those who can't read English or just don't notice the sign.

I have tiny ear holes. And another website.

I finally got my MP3 player working. Well, someone got it working for me. Its great my favourite 30 songs available at any time.

Only problem is my ear holes are too small for the ear buds out there. So how do kids do it? Maybe I have mishappen holes which just don't allow for ear buds. Anyhow I like wearing my little headphones because people assume I can't hear them. I can. So far I have not intercepted anything of note but I will be sure to post anything of interest.

In the meantime here is a site my brother got me onto: passiveaggressivenotes.com Its hilarious and I have to say I'm much more careful in what I say to people - I'm sure there are memos out there that are best left filed away in some dark filing cabinet. I used to have an employee that insisted on correcting my spelling and grammar. In red. She was a pain in the butt and she finally quit on me in the middle of shift. Turns out she was thinking she could quit and get unemployment. Smart girl hadn't kept up with the news that the legislation had changed and quitting was no longer a valid exit strategy for EI.

Friday's Feast Feb 1

Appetizer
What is your favorite kind of cereal?

Ooh, I love Corn Pops. I also love Fruit Loops but only once in awhile.

Soup
When was the last time you purchased something for your home, what was it, and in which room did it go?

Hmm. Okay, I bought sheets a few weeks ago. They are still in the hall but they will obviously go on the bed. We are saving up for a queen sized bed - the double is great in the winter but in the summer I can't stand sleeping next to the human furnace that is my husband.



Salad
What is the funniest commercial you’ve ever seen?

I don't remember. But does anyone remember the Groaning Board. It had a small buffet and then you went into a room where they showed the world's funniest commercials. We went there for my husband's 30th birthday and I still remember fighting off the cockroaches.


Main Course
Make up a name for a company by using a spice and an animal (example: Cinnamon Monkey).

Basil Bear


Dessert
Fill in the blank: I haven’t ______ since ______.

I haven't cried in the Pickle Barrel since last year. Private joke for my PB companion.

I now have gold coins....

The televangelist Peter Popoff is still sending me stuff started when I called his prayer line back before Christmas. I haven't send him a cent but in the past months I have received:

Miracle Prayer Water
A "vine of life"
Tiny communion wafers - he refers to it as holy bread or some such thing.
Sand from the Holy Land
A cloth perfumed in incense.
An American dollar bill

and now 2 gold angel coins.

What I don't get is that I have never once sent him any money and yet all the treats still come. If you have kids that love getting mail this is one freebie that keeps on giving. Just don't let them read the letters - I got one telling me that he had an image of me with a someone close to me standing on a sidewalk with Satan planning to hurt my friend/relative. Unless I send money of course.

The gold coins are kinda neat. I think I'm supposed to mail one back and bury the other.

We had a discussion in church about how some people think Christians are weird. Its not that Christians are weird its just that the weird ones really go to great lengths to stand out!!