Best Worship

I was asked to do the service today at a nursing home.

I spend most of my time trying to find someone who did not have plans on Sunday afternoon to play piano. Finally, as I was trying to find midi files to play in lieu of a pianist, an angel was found who was available.

I thought about the message and came across Romans 8. There were parts of the passage that talked about no one able to condemn us and that nothing separates us from the love of God. So I centered my talk about what Easter means in terms of God's love using John 3:16 as a starting point as I figured the older folks would know that passage by heart and would like to hear it.

I didn't put a lot of effort in making the reading come alive - the passage is so self explanatory that to add to it almost detracts from it. I felt guilty for not pouring more time into it but couldn't find a way to add to it without lengthening the service or adding words just to appease the sermon critics.

It was awful. My pianist arrived a bit late and without her glasses. We tried one song - Christ Arose which is too low for me and the tune is a bit foggy for me until we get to the chorus. That was when it became really clear that the pianist needed something to help her see the notes. As she ran off to find some reading glasses I plugged along.

At one point, one of the women looked totally disgusted with me! But I understood - hearing about Christ isn't the same as experiencng Christ and if you live in a nursing home you are bound to be jaded. I continued on relieved to see the pianist back with her glasses.

Amazing Grace went much better - and it was at that point that I figured out why the lack of a tune was killing me - there were none of the strong singers from the church who normally help out! The room was relying on me and one other woman (who didn't agree with me on the tune) to get through the songs. I just tried to sing a bit more confidently and cut out some songs.

Thankfully, after Amazing Grace the daughter of a resident told us about the story of its writing and I was able to tie that into the grace of Christ and what it means for someone to be absolved of their guilt. What a relief for a bit of an intervention.

On my way out to the car, I thought about my recent preaching experiences which have been so disappointing and wondering if I just don't have the skill set for it and its time to face this honestely. Then I thought about my next sermon on Wednesday which is about how I can't convince someone to come to faith, I can only provide a witness.

The nursing supervisor thanked us many times for coming on Easter - they weren't expecting a service because I guess they knew everyone is too involved in their own plans. One resident recited John 3:16 with me (I was wise enough to take it from the King James version). Most residents joined in on the Lord's prayer and many sang Amazing Grace and Rock of Ages. I think our efforts with our sincerity was magnificent to God.

If preaching comes hard in these situations then it makes me rely so much more on God to do his thing. Whether these experiences are a just a means of teaching me this I don't know. I know when I first started preaching I always got good reviews. I pray that I will have the wisdom to know whether this is testing me for my humility or whether I just suck at giving the message. I get to give it another try on Wednesday in class, but I have to say I am feeling very unsure.

C. told me later that the woman who was making faces and seemed so annoyed at the message was actually reacting to a lady sitting across from her who was making chewing faces! To continue to bring a message with all of these worries and distractions was good and I think I learned some more today.