Anything for a Dollar

Okay, the Dollar Stores have gone over the top. I love looking in there and rarely get out without some kind of purchase. I feel guilty because I suspect that most everything in there is the result of low wages in some stuffy factory. And some of the stuff you can get elsewhere for far less then a dollar. Too think I used to shop in real stores!!

Bandages, makeup, denture containers are not unusual. But I saw a home pregnancy kit. Just how accurate are one of these? If you are that strapped for cash maybe you should go to the doctor and get a lab requisition. It just seems weird to buy one at the dollar store. How important is it that you know for sure?

You can learn a lot about a neighbourhood by the things sold in the stores. One Shopper's in a special area of Toronto keeps the condoms up at the front. Partly to prevent stealing but mostly so the purchasers are repeat customers and don't have a lot of time.

A Giant Tiger out in Ottawa used to keep the airplane glue at the counter. I like Giant Tiger so I'm hoping it was to ensure it was being purchased for the right reason and not for the sniffers to find it easier.

In BC we looked all over for gravol and couldn't find any. It was behind the counter because the local kids were taking it to get stoned.

If you notice that razor blades are often up at the front its because they get shoplifted alot, that and batteries. I have no idea why.

If you think I seem to know way too much about what's in stores its partly because I love looking in stores but mostly because my brother worked retail for a long time and I worked counting inventory for some time (a whole blog in itself - I've got stories!). Since becoming Christian and going on a mission trip I don't have the irresitible urge to spend like I used to but I still have the love of window shopping!

Dangerous Google Searches

My cat's bum is looking a little sore. I don't know why and not wanting to risk an expensive vet visit for something I can treat with products from the Dollar Store I decided to Google it.

Well I always google with just a few nouns and verbs. I never bother trying to look for a specific site unless I have one in mind.

I googled

bald anus

Yup, without thinking I hit enter and off I went on an extremely interesting journey! I'm sure my IP address is now tagged by the RCMP.

To Sing or Not To Sing

I have problems with boundaries. I tend to push into other people's if I think something is unjust. So when my therapist told me that her church decided not to have a choir anymore because they only want a praise team* I immediately knew what I would have done. I would have gotten the choir together and had them sit in one area of the church together and we would have belted out every tune! Not that I like choirs - the better they are the less I can understand what they are singing. Now at the other end of the spectrum is Ian's friend who "goes to church every Sunday". Ian was surprised to find out that he goes to church - but then the truth came out - he is paid to sing in the choir. He shows up for practice once a week and on Sunday to sing. He is not a church member and basically shows for the paycheque. Somewhere between not wanting the services of a choir and paying people to fill the holes in the choir suits me just fine!

*non-churched dictionary - this took me forever to figure out, and I still don't get it. Churches tend to have a choir - usually in robes that sing the older hymns and are can be informal to very formal. A Praise Team is a small group of people who stand at the front and are usually good singers but less formal in what they sing. More uplifting, emotional stuff with instruments like drums and guitars (gasp!). I have yet to figure out why a praise team is necessary and maybe I'm ahead of my time but I would like to see praise teams abolished. Have instruments and stuff to play the music but for goodness sakes the whole congregation should be the praise team!

Alpha - Perspective on Ministry

I somehow got pulled into Alpha. Well, no, it was my own fault. The person who runs it asked me when I go to school and learning that I'm free Thursdays wanted to know if I could cover off some Alpha sessions during his vacation. He's done this before, he books Alpha then looks for a backup. I'm the only backup left and I agreed to cover his weeks. Well tonight was the first session and I'm covering the next two weeks so I ended up staying tonight to sit in since I need to meet the people and they need to meet me.

I was thinking about ministry. I always thought there would be a moment when I was officially doing ministry. But there isn't -I'm always doing it. Stepping in to do Alpha is something I can do and should do since we lack another leader at the moment. That's ministry. That's it. You do up Sunday worship and then step in and out of roles the rest of the week. Show up at meetings, visit people and somewhere in there do your own devotions to keep connected to God so you can step into whatever needs doing. I'm leading a worship service at a nursing home in a few weeks time and I have no idea what I will do. I've never been there, I don't even know if they have a piano which means a capella for me again which I force myself to do but really would rather not.

Its not that I'm disappointed, its just that somewhere between the summer and now I'm suddenly doing ministry much like a pastor. Not with the full responsibilities but slowly getting there. I have the benefit of still being able to screw up a lot because I am learning so this is still gravy.

So two people came to Alpha - two that we weren't expecting and another seven didn't show that we were. And the two that show are Christian. At first I'm irritated because one of them is the kind of Christian that has turned me off Christianity in the past. But I realise that this is ministry - its not about me its about the other person and their needs. And I realise that as much as I am passionate about non-Christians that I have a lot that I can share with Christians in terms of leading to deeper understandings of Christ and broadening the appreciation of what it means to be a Christ follower and what church is supposed to be about. Why would people in a church come out to Alpha if they weren't seeking something - maybe friends, or a non-judgemental new face or a better understanding. The servant thing is starting to take hold in my heart - God serves everyone, thankfully he isn't choosy like I am!

Anyhow I have a great opportunity to listen and not set the agenda and to learn more about churched Christians and what they seek so I'll pray about that for next week!

I'm backkk

Yup, I'm back after a long hiatus. The Holland trip just brought out nasty blogging on my part and I had to take a break.

Now that I'm back into school and getting a new rhythym with work/ministry and school I need to find time to laugh!

Like today - I went for a stress test for my heart. I had nagging arm pain in August and went to the ER where I quickly determined that the nurse knew I wasn't having a heart attack so I left. My doc however wanted a stress test and I figured I better though I'm sure it was a waste of OHIP's money.

It really was a stress test - I stressed about it! What do I wear, will there be people watching me, how stupid am I going to look. And then there is the whole weird feeling of being back in NYGH. Its so weird - everything looks different and yet I run into people I worked with and it seems like I've entered another dimension.

In the end I had to get my heart up to 179 - I think I got it close enough. And there was nothing to worry about it was all very dignified.

I had this strange moment though when I looked at the men and women dressed in their work clothes and shiny shoes and felt that I missed it. Something about walking around in heels and skirts and jackets and talking about very technical things - its like a game and a culture that I know so well it feels comfortable.

I have to find a new hospital, I just hate going back there!

Help - The Children's Message

While the pastor is away for 4 Sundays I may be called upon to do the Children's Message. For the uninitiated this is when the children of the congregation are called up and the pastor gives them something to think about - it should be interesting, something that all ages can relate to, memorable and connected with the theme and message of the service.

I can preach a 20 minute sermon but the 5 minute time with the children kills me. It takes me a week to come up with the idea and prop. Some of the children require guidance in listening. Some continually point their bum up in the air towards the congregation during the message. Some interupt continually with non related info mumbled so that I can't tell if the child is communicating their love of video games, that they are hungry or that the balcony is on fire. And until I can convince the Pastor that I now have this down and am comfortable with it he is going to give me lots of opportunities to do it. Its going to be a long month!

Oh No, I've Discovered youtube

Our PC sound wasn't working for the longest time and now that it is I have access to youtube. I came across this link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1u93VduIUI

Its about clown training as a form of ministry and at first I was convinced they were kidding but by the end I'm not too sure. It was funny but not enough to be a satire. Anyone who knows my fear of clowns will understand that clown ministry is in my books one of the Dark Arts.

The MultiMedia Generation

I was playing a board game with the kids that their father used to play. Its actually quite fun because it relies on lots of spaces that say take another turn and move ahead and draw cards and stuff so they don't get too bored with it. During the game one of them realised it was time for a cartoon he likes. He asked me to "pause the game while we watch this". I explained that boards games are not like X Box where we pause the game - Aunt Vicki is not going to sit in suspended animation for half an hour. I lost out to a cheesy cartoon! Some of the cartoons - particularly the anime ones totally lose me. There is one where its a guy but as a superhero he turns into an adult androgenous woman - as near as I can tell.

I'm old.

When I Grow Up.

Apparently my four year old niece (well not biologically) sees some mothering instincts in me. She told me yesteray that "You will make a good mommy when you grow up". I'm not sure if this is a statement on my adultness or just that she figures if you don't have children you haven't grown up yet. She asked her brother for confirmation (he's 5) and he gave a rather unenthusiastic sound. I don't let them get away with much so maybe he's figuring that he could find better!

He later told me that when I get old I am going to yell at people and he killed himself laughing. Now this is in fact quite true - I just couldn't figure out how he knew that. He remembered a card my brother got me in June with an old lady on the front who is a crank and how as I reach old age that's where I'm going. I was quite surprised that he could remember this card but apparently it has struck a chord with him.

Weddings in Edwards Gardens

SO On 07/07/07 Lesley and I went to see the brides at Edwards Gardens. In the parking lot we came across a few cars "decorated" with white fabric and gold tinsel - it looked like a Christmas angel was taken out on a hit and run. Well, we found the wedding party that these cars belonged to - you may have seen them on the news. We took a picture because I just don't have the full vocabularly to really paint the picture.

An older lady came over and was not very approving - she told us the world is changing and she can't keep up.

We later saw a beautiful wedding which took place after the Egyptian/Roman theme. Unfortunately as the bride and groom were saying there vows a man decided that that was a good time to get right in there and take some pictures of the fountain - then his family joined him. I wanted to go down and quietly lead them away - the people around us were muttering and murmuring about how outrageous it was and can't they see there is a wedding go on and so forth. Anyhow, Lesley didn't want me to get involved - but my feet were itching to go and fix it!

Weddings at the gardens are a riot. You are guaranteed to see a wide range of fashions - particularly the bridesmaids, some really cheesy photo shoots and the occasional ceremony. I doubt I will see one quite like this one again though!